In the middle of the night last night, I took a walk. Strolling in the dark thinking about the last 5 years of my life I wondered what could possibly be up ahead for me? What would the adventures be like? What could happen? And as I came back and laid down in bed, I took another walk in my mind. That story, is the story I am going to write for you today.

. . .

There I walked

In that fog soaked morning

Amongst the cities and towns

Of my life

Craters riddled the land

Telling stories of agony

Buildings soared into the sky

Speaking volumes of resilience

The lighted areas danced brightly

And the darkness crept throughout the woods

I stepped into many places

To take a last look

To sit in the memories

Of this lovely world

I saw the people

Who have long been gone

And smiled at the times

We had spent together

I remembered the letters I had written

Penned straight from the heart

Putting them down one last time

I saw the triumphs

Despite the challenges

And witnessed those times of great weakness

Never breaking me

But only granting me scars

And many stories to tell

I walked amongst this place one last time

And as I left each building or patch of land behind

I soaked it with gasoline

Smiling as I went

This place built me

Granted me the greatest experiences of my life

This place wounded me

And at the same time taught me

The most important lessons I would ever learn






This place

Was a wonderful place I had to admit

How beautiful it was

The dark and the light

Mixing in together harmoniously

And yet there I was

Drenching it all

That sweet stench of gas

Mixed with the lasting burn of diesel

I never really knew

As I did it

If I would ever actually light it

Maybe I was hoping that a spark would do it itself?

I never really knew…

But I went on

Strolling through that city

Harboring everything in me

Over these past 25 years

When I felt the time was right

I stepped back onto that dock

With a trail of fuel behind me

Untied my ropes

Dropped the sails

And took off

Without the urge to ever look back

And yet right before I disappeared over the horizon

I felt it come over me

A swift desire

To do something I always wished of doing

So I grabbed that bow

And drew an arrow

Dipping it in oil

And lit it with a match

I drew hard

Aimed high into the sky

And took a split second

To look back on all that I had built

And without hesitation


It was the greatest sight I’d ever seen

A sight never to be forgotten

And I smiled

As it was all engulfed in flames

Roaring into the sky

And in that moment

The heavens witnessed

My new covenant

There was no going back

There were only new ways

I took one last look

And turned around

With a smirk on my face

Feeling the heat on my back

Dropping off the horizon

Never to return

Never to return

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project