One of my favorite teachers I have ever had is my history teacher Fr. McKevitt. He is one of the hardest graders I have ever come across, but he taught me how to write like none other. I attribute a lot of my writing to his teachings. So thank you Father. What I am writing about today is a small lesson he taught me. In short, he gave me a sort of Thanksgiving homily and told me the next few pieces of advice.

1. Acceptance of condition: Always accept your current condition. No matter what it is, love who you are with every single fiber of your body. In order to transform your condition, you actually have to accept where you are currently. This is one of the biggest pieces of advice I have ever been given. It is interesting how many times I have heard this. You have to be aware of what is going on in your life right now, in order to make legitimate changes in your life. I never talk about fixing things because you cannot make something better or make something worse in your life. It is just different. It is what it is. What is better or worse anyways?

2. The ability to make right choices: For me, this all comes down to standing for certain things in your life. What do you stand for? If you truly do stand for them, you will continually make the right choices based on those principles. I have been making good choices lately, not because I have to think about them (although big decisions you want to) but because those little in the moment choices you have to make, I have been making them with my gut which is based on lots of practice and reminders of what my principles are. To me, that is more valuable than anything else. The other day I was confronted with a situation where I totally would have done something completely different if this was about 5 months ago. However, in that moment, I kept my integrity and was able to leave with my head held up high. I also was able to  stand up for myself and what I believe in. So for that, I pat myself on the back. Recently I haven’t had the situation to do that a lot lately. Piece of advice from me…when you do something great, pat yourself on the back, smile, and move on…dont gloat its in the past.

3. Enjoy: Do what you love. I don’t have much else to say about this because you should spend your life doing what you love. Spend it in awe of what life can bring. I am doing that right now. I am so incredibly happy. Not because I want things to stay the same or expect them to be a certain way, but just because I am present. Being present in this moment is priceless. Try. Just take 30 seconds to just focus into nothing. No past. No Future. It’s an amazing feeling.

4. Give Back: Give back to those around you. Everyone’s calling is different. Fr. Mc.’s calling is to be a Jesuit priest. I know that is not my calling. However, I am starting to hear myself much better these days. I am starting to hear a voice inside me saying…do it, go for it, give it a shot. Whatever it is. Whether its running an extra half a mile or a mile on a leg that hasn’t been run on in months…my brain is saying, try…try…try. Give back to those around you. Pump them up. Make them feel how excited you are about life. If you have been let in on something that is amazing and you are unbelievably passionate about it, make sure you are sharing it with others and give them the tools so they can turn their life into one they love. Care for the group. That is one of the biggest lessons I have learned all summer. Authentically care for those around you, even if you don’t know them.

If you want to see how bad I want the following things, this video will summarize where I am at mentally this evening.

These are the following things I am making my goals for this upcoming month. So, by December 20th, I will have achieved each one of these goals, or, the consequence is 1,000 sit-ups and 500 push ups for each goal not accomplished. I would make myself run 10 miles for each goal not accomplished, but I am not there on the recovery stage yet.

  1. I have a six-pack.
  2. I complete 20 Churchill Visions
  3. I write in my food log every day (So if I miss a day…1,000 sit-ups, 500 push ups)
  4. I read 10 books
  5. I save $100 a month
  6. I write in my blog every day (So if I miss a day…1,000 sit-ups, 500 push ups)

I am serious about these goals. But the interesting thing with goals is that you have to be able to motivate yourself to never give up and never surrender to your mind telling your mind telling you you can’t do it. You can do anything you want to do. Believe in yourself no matter what. I know things may be hard sometimes, but you have to 100% believe, if if you don’t know how to accomplish your goal right now, that you can do it. There is no fear in my heart. You want something. Go get it. Period. No one has the right to tell you that its not possible.

There is one snippet of advice that I heard the other day and this is somethingI want to end on tonight. Don’t focus too much on Plan B because it takes away your focus from Plan A. Give everything you have to the plan you have made right now. If you fail, the go to Plan B. But don’t expect yourself to fail. Expect yourself to be great and you will go out and be great.

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project