When I gave up searching for the man I thought I should become, I gave myself the chance to see I was the man I needed to be. A tortured soul she said to me. Tortured. And I looked back and smiled. “Mhmm. We make for the most interesting dinner conversations. But she was right and I knew it. My soul has been tortured for years. I could venture to say it has been tortured since the beginning. My first memory is being hospitalized due to my appendix exploding…when I was three. The fact of the matter is, smooth waters never created a tried and true sailor. It is the times we are tested and yes, even tortured, that create strength. Strength was never…