You Can’t Yell At A Flower To Make It Grow Faster
Posted on November 30, 2021
I had connected with who I really was, gained back my courage and confidence from that pesky wolf of fear and for the first time in a long time, things were going very well.
I was tackling a lot of challenges, making some good progress on my goals and dreams and I was ecstatic about moving forward.
Off in the distance I could see everything I had ever wanted. My potential was right there and like Ricky Bobby In Taledega Nights I stepped on that gas pedal.
I got blindsided by life and knocked flat on my back. What happened?
I started failing over and over again just in a different ways this time.
This was driving me absolutely crazy.
I was at the point of wondering if the heavens themselves were getting a good laugh out of watching me struggle. I didn’t know if I was living in some sort of lie or if it was all some bad joke.
All I knew is that I wanted out. Where’s the jailbreak!?
I used to joke about my Guardian Angel having a drinking problem and always showing up late to help me out, but not this time.
Right when I landed in this pit, I was heading into my last week- long session at coaching school.
During our first break I went up to my coach and started emotionally barfing all of this stuff out about everything going wrong in my life.
I was saying things like, “What’s the point of all of this work if I’m not making progress and achieving my goals?!” I was very frustrated and pretty much done at this point.
She stood there with me for about 10 minutes until I finally took a breath and then walked me over to a plant in the corner of the room.
She said, “Evan, tell me about this plant here.”
What does this have to do with anything?
She goes, “Come on, tell me.”
Okay I’ll play. Well, there’s the roots, the stem, the leaves and the flower. How in the world is this going to help me?
She looked at me with a smile on her face and said, “Good. Now, can you stand over that flower and yell at it to make it grow faster?”
I knew exactly what she was getting at. It hit me like a sack of bricks.
I had fallen into a “get there, there, there” mindset.
You know, the one where you try to get to that island where it all turns out. The I’ll be happy when island. Because I was racing towards this finish line, I was committing one huge error.
I wasn’t being patient and trusting the process.
I was pushing for everything to happen right this instant and that’s not how life works…at all.
Imagine going into a garden, dumping fertilizer on a seed, pouring way too much water on it and yelling at it expecting it to do something. It’s kind of like that.
No wonder things weren’t working.
I looked back at her and said, “Roger that. I get it. Thank you.”
Later that night, I was watching Kung Fu Panda and Master Oogway says to the panda who is struggling with a similar situation, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift. That’s why they call it the present.”
Ok universe I get it!
It was time to plug back in and trust the process.
From that moment on, I let things play out the way they were supposed to, never forcing a result and started to watch everything change around me.
My goals and dreams started to unfold in their own time and the anxiety that I used to feel about the future disappeared.
I realized how wonderful life is when you don’t force it and you’re patient.
That’s when things really started to take off for me. The more patient I was the better chance I had to achieve my goals.
This nugget of wisdom has been absolutely priceless.
I have used this lesson in coaching so many different people and it has helped them make huge breakthroughs. Many have healed their pain, unhappiness, addictions, depression, anxiety, body image, negative thoughts and emotions and the list really goes on.
The one undeniable truth in all of this is that when you show up here and you let things play out as they need to, that’s when everything starts to click and fall into place.
So you might be thinking, “But I don’t have time to be
patient.” You have to learn. This one secret prevents you from spending years spinning your wheels and stunting your own growth. When you push too hard, you have the opposite effect of what you really want.
You also might be thinking, “But there looks so much better than here.” That future that you want though actually depends on what is going on “here.” If you don’t show up here, if you aren’t patient enough to let things grow, you’ll never actually get there.
Trust me, I don’t want you to spend your entire life rowing to that island “where it all turns out” (and never make it) and abandon the path you were meant to travel the entire time.
This final secret glues everything together.
If you can trust the process and be patient, everything will start to unfold as it should and you will start unlocking all of the doors in front of you.
If you’re looking for some help/support with life right now are are interested in learning more about how my 1 on 1 private coaching sessions work, please go to www.1on1withevan.com