The decision to face your deepest of fears is amongst the most courageous decisions you can possibly make and yet present the most challenging of circumstances.
On one hand, the monumental will it takes to finally turn and face the darkness is to be celebrated in of itself.
But the journey doesn’t end there. That’s only where it begins.
What comes after that moment is where each of us are truly defined in our ability to light a once opaque path – holding onto our faith as much as possible – and move through whatever comes our way.
The bog of failures and missteps will be endless.
Fear, doubt and worry will rush in at any possible chance.
The temptations will try to tear you off course.
And yet, if you stay true to your cause, you will have your victory.
I believe that the journey begins once you decide in your heart that you’re actually going to do it. From that point on, you are on the path. You may spend days, months, or even years trying to make any sort of noticeable progress. You may feel like you haven’t achieved anything much at all. But the truth is, you’re still on the path.
You made the hardest decision of them all and that counts for something. That counts for a lot. Don’t ever forget that.
As I get ready to forge through the valley of my fears, I acknowledge that it took a lot for me to even get to this place.
As has been true historically, right before I have my biggest breakthrough all of my inner demons come out to work against me. This has definitely been the case once again.
I see them. They thwarted my plans and won endless battles. But they didn’t win this war.
If you can find it within you to recognize that the only way to lose is to quit completely, then somewhere along the line you will find the courage to begin again.
As much as it might not feel like it at times, even the long pauses between efforts still count.
While you may not like how long it took you to regroup and build up the courage to make another attempt, it’s still a worthwhile piece of the journey. There’s a lot of wisdom that lives there. In fact, there’s a lot of wisdom in the whole thing no matter the current circumstances.
I don’t know exactly when it was, but somewhere along the way recently I found that willingness inside of me again to pay off some of these outstanding debts to my soul.
I’ve lost a lot.
I’ve fallen even harder.
Nothing about any of this feels foreign.
But I’ve never failure stand and have the last laugh. I always come back to try again and to refuse to let something end on a bad note.
I have to make this right with myself.
Whatever it takes.
Redemption at its finest.
Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project