Every once in a great while we are given a unique opportunity to rise to the best versions of ourselves and embark upon a path of discovering who we really are.

If we find the courage within ourselves to step forward and answer the call, we begin a process of such infinite change that predicting exactly where we will end up becomes impossible. All we know is that who we will become is closer to our true nature.

These paths that exist in front of us come at a great cost. Sacrifices will need to be made. And usually, those sacrifices come at the cost of letting go of old ways of showing up in the world.

In order to cross through the threshold of your new journey, you have to fully let go of the previous one you have taken to get to this point.

The truth is new beginnings only arrive after embraced endings.

And that’s the hard part isn’t it?

Embracing the ending of something.

As I have been looking at my life, there has been this column of items labeled “unfinished business” being written within my soul.

Promises that I have made. Dreams that I’ve had. Wrongs that I would like to right. Old karma to clean up.

And as the days have gone by, that list has become clearer and clearer.

I also discovered that all of these things were not meant to be tackled one by one. They weren’t a function of random individual events happening. No, they were a function of how I was showing up in the world for such a long time – conscious or unconscious – and they all had to be dealt at once by going down fix the roots.

I’m reminded of that old zen buddhist slogan that goes, “Correct all wrongs with one single intention.”

That’s where I’ve landed.

Naturally, once I came to understand how I arrived where I am, the teachers showed up and the journey forward presented itself.

This is where The Long Pause began.

For some time now, I’ve put off what I knew I had to do. The truth is, I didn’t want to let go of what I had before. When it has taken you so many years to build yourself up to a place that you finally feel comfortable with, it can be an incredibly uncomfortable feeling having to acknowledge that you now have to let go of a lot of it for something far better.

Even though you know internally that what’s on the other side is what truly aligns with your heart and soul, there can still be a lot of fear that holds you back from making the steps necessary to move forward.

So I’ve been in this holding pattern.

And how do I know that this is the right path?

For as long as I have paused, nothing has changed at all. If anything, what needs to be done has become more and more clear. That’s how I know. I can feel it in my bones.

And I’m ready to let go so what’s truly meant for me can show up.

I’m ready to make the sacrifices through and through. Whatever it takes.

I know over this past couple of years I haven’t been able to say that, but after years of living in the same story, I feel like I’m finally ready to start writing a different chapter.

On a deeper level, I completely understand that I’m not only the pen, but the paper, the hand and the ink. That’s far more power than I ever thought I had so many years ago.

The only issue was what I thought, what I said, and what I did weren’t in complete alignment. When that happens, there can be some integrity lapses that cause things to stall out no matter how much energy you put into them.

I guess I’ll finish with this…

It’s been my belief for as long as I can remember that no matter the script that has been written in the past, you have the capacity to make unbelievable changes in your life and head in a totally new direction if you really want to.

It’s going to take courage. It’s going to take some sacrifices. You’re going to have to work against the momentum for a while of the past ways of life.

But you can do it.

You can make the change.

You can become who you’re meant to be.

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project