What is my destiny?
I think it’s a question we all ask. We want to know how the game ends for us.
Will we do all of the things we wanted to do in our lives? How will it all end up? How will the journey finish?
But that takes away from the journey itself.
That takes a way from being in the moment and wanting to know how the future is going to pan out. The greatest times I have ever had of overwhelming internal pressure was when I disconnected from the moment and tried to live in the future. It literally caused my life to crumble.
I disconnected from people, what was going on around me, actually living my life and taking the time to experience what was actually happening in this world.
I outcasted myself by living in a mental prison…one that I created for myself.
So maybe the question really isn’t “What is my destiny?”
Maybe the question you should be asking is “How will I make my destiny?”
At a fundamental level, I don’t believe that things are planned out for us and we don’t have really any options in how things story writes itself. I think there’s an undercurrent that is trying to guide our lives in the right direction, but the decisions and consequences of those decisions are completely in our realm.
We act or don’t act…and each of those paths have repercussions that will steer us in a completely new direction.
I believe to think that we are on some timeline of development, destruction, or growth is a bit shortsighted and not indicative of how the world actually works. If you really start to experiencing living in the moment, you being to understand that life is a non-linear thing and grows, expands, and shrinks at will.
It’s a living breathing thing…that flexes and contracts. It never scoots along how “it’s supposed to.”
It’s an uncontrollable thing and yet somehow we function seamlessly within it when we really allow ourselves to be carried by trust. That, for me, has been and continues to be one of the hardest concepts to grasp. At times, I’ve tried my best to control the things that were uncontrollable to absolutely no avail.
And that’s just the way it goes.
Even though we are constantly asking that question – what is my destiny? – we need to be coming back, over and over again, to being in what is right here and now. Trying to see the future is absolutely none of your business. That will be taken care of in the perfect way.
The only thing you need to be at all concerned with is who you are being in this moment – who you are right now.
Have an idea of what you would like to do and create that in the moments that you have at your disposal. Drop the past. Forget the things that harmed you and bring with you the happy memories of what served you.
End your battling with living in the two places you can’t actually go – the past & the future.
Instead…come back.
Come back to being here.
It’s the only moment you have.
Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project