I’ve had a profound weekend. Profound because of the conversations that bloomed from those who were struggling. Profound because of those whispers in my ears again telling me that what I was doing is what I should be doing. Those timeless glimpses of the future. That’s what keeps me moving forward. That’s what excites me.

The one thing that I have really learned how to do over the past year or so is to let my emotions flow through me. When I am down I let them out. When I am up I enjoy them to the max. We are all fluid beings. Emotions run over us like the tides of the ocean. Most of the time it is memories of our past that stem these feelings…and they can be quite significant. But sometimes, the power of the moment we are in hits us like a speeding train, and those are special moments.

Truly living in the present can be difficult at times, but when you are in that moment, you feel it instead of trying to achieve it. You are just there. 

If we let our minds spend too much time processing in the future and the past we give up our ability to create in the present. This is much easier said than done of course. For whatever reason, we are absolutely obsessed with the way things used to be or the way things will be…instead of the way things are.

Now I won’t lie, I am a dreamer. I spend a great deal of time hatching my plans for the future and creating my grand vision. But I have learned from mentorship and reading that I need to 1. have a foundation of gratitude for what I have right now and 2. always be in action in regards to creating that grand future.

I have met a lot of people who have this want and desire for something better, yet aren’t doing what it takes today to get there tomorrow. I myself used to be that person. I say used to because I have changed that reality. I now, without excuse (most of the time) or reason always take a step, even if it just a single step, towards my grand dream and making it happen.

Sometimes a step is all you need.

That first step can be rough. It’s hard because you can’t see the next 200ft in front of you because it’s covered in fog. Fog so thick that you can’t even see what is beyond it. But you keep running, almost on your tippy toes because you want to be ready if something comes up that you couldn’t see. And that’s fine. Be ready. But always stay running.

The hardest part of any journey isn’t the actual work you have to put in or the middle or the end, but the first step.

I will always believe in that. The first step is the hardest because you are doing something you’ve never done before. After I accomplished my 14 week challenge, I took about 2 weeks to start the next 14 week challenge. Even though I had done it before, I still have nerves and doubts about if I could do it again. The one thing that was there though that wasn’t there before was a pure excitement of achieving this next goal rather than a fear of it not working.

That helped me once again take my first step. This time, it was a lot easier.

There is no doubt in my mind that I will once again cross the 28 week mark as a completely new and changed man. I am just a tad over halfway through everything and I can already see the changes in my life. The other day when I was going through my old book I realized just how much effort I was giving to trying these challenges – and just how much I was failing over and over again. In my words there was always a sense of hope, but at the same time, there was an undercurrent of despair.

Now the hope is still there, along with deep seeded resilience and for the first time – confidence. What could you not do with those three?

This past month has been an interesting one in terms of my changing moods and mindset. If anything, it has spurred a lot of honesty with myself. I have been thinking about things that have happened in the past – those events that have defined my life – and I have seen just how much of a role to play I had. It really hasn’t been an ego smack, but more of a realization of something that I probably knew already deep inside of me. There’s been no breakdown, no tears, no pressure on myself, but just coming to peace with the fact that the honesty has driven a new reality.

That being said, it wasn’t all fun and games thinking about some of the events that have happened. And honestly, there were things that just happened. But for a few situations, I shed some light on everything.

Anyways, this post kind of went everywhere, but there is one thing that I want to really come away with. Put in the work. That’s the only thing that’s ever going to make it all happen. Sure you may be scared when you start, but if you miss out on putting in the work, you will absolutely never reach where you want to. Work your butt off. Swear. Blood. Tears. Nothing short of your best.

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project