Those golden doors of opportunity are chained, not by a physical chain, but by a mental block you have to overcome…typically, looking like fear. 

“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” – Walk Disney

I found out a while ago that “talking” about your dream is actually one of the most ineffective ways of actually accomplishing it. However, having it live in your mind, now thats the good stuff. If you let your dream consume your thoughts, your motives, your actions and feelings, then things start getting real. You start turning that dream into a reality day by day. But you have to work. You have to work work work…and a little bit more work. 

One of the main complaints about my generation is that we do not know how to work. To some degree I think that may be true. But what I feel is that it is not a dramatic shift from the generation before us to the generation I live in, but rather a stricter polarization of the classes in my age. We are the generation of “self-esteem” and have been taught that everyone deserves a trophy, that feeling good about yourself is what matters, and unintentionally…that we are entitled to certain things. I grew up in this generation and I can say, as a direct result of it, I have had to personally harden up and understand that life can be a bully, and you have to put on your gloves and go in round after round demeaning what you dream of out of life. You have to combine your personal belief with a absolute desire to continue no matter how many times you fail. 

Huge learning lessons. 

I don’t consider myself naturally talented at what I do, but what I have learned, and this is something that the gym has taught me over and over again…is how to work my butt off. Do I think I have reached my potential in that arena? No, in fact, I feel like I am just getting started. I have felt what it is like to have things taken from me, to be completely demoralized, and to take a nap when I was tired instead of continuing working. There is that decision day after day to either mess around and “get by” or to grind it out and get ahead. I have made both decisions, but it is always more comfortable to stay comfortable. I am working on that right now. 

“It’s worth recognizing that there is no such thing as an overnight success. You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure. The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive. At that time, we turn around and say, yes, this is obviously where I was going all along. It’s a good idea to try to enjoy the scenery on the detours, because you’ll probably take a few.” – Bill Watterson, Cartoonist

The detours I have made in my life has actually brought me the most wisdom. Detours, by nature, are a pain in the butt, and just like life, we are taught the greatest of lessons during the down times. However, it is during those down times that we muster up the greatest strength to continue on our journey and to fight no matter what. 

I sincerely believe that filthy dogged determination is the answer to most of our problems.

When I don’t see results, when I am not getting the desired outcomes I wish for, I am now digging in deeper to find more answers within myself and searching the outside world for guidance. This is new. Before, I would just dive into writing and expect an answer to come out from that. However, as I have learned from reading book after book and articles like crazy, there is so much more wisdom in the finished journey that someone else has already accomplished than my  continuing one. This is not to say that I am not getting value from what I am writing etc, however, it is a different type of value altogether. 

There are major projects at play right now, things that I am working on and putting into action that take a lot of time and effort, and let me tell you, I am exhausted. But there is something keeping me going. That thing is probably the knowledge that if I face my fear, those golden doors of opportunity will open and that chain will be broken. I’ve been banging on those doors for a while now and it’s time to come in. 

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project