The day you realize that you are really the only one who can determine and create your personal value is a very important day. Too often I have allowed myself to crumble because of the lack of character of others. This is a monumental realization for me for a few reasons. The first is that I have come to realize that “Expectation is the root of all heartache.” William Shakespeare was a pretty smart man I would venture to say. I believe fully that instead of living a life where you have incredibly high expectations for those around you (sometimes unachievable ones) and living a life where you are constantly disappointed – you should go a different route.

What does that route look like? Demand a lot from yourself, and simply ask for honesty and respect from others. I know that even those two expectations for some may be hard to meet, but that is where I draw my personal boundary line. Then, I go on with my days happily surprised by people instead of disappointed.

The standards you set for yourself as a human being are some of the most important choices out there. I truly believe that whatever you project out into the world will eventually come back to you. Positive karma & the law of attraction. It’s a never-ending journey though…the question of “Can I give more?” And I agree – the answer is almost always yes.

The choices, words, and beliefs of others are out of your control. All you can ask from yourself is to act with grace and like a lady/gentleman. It is tough sometimes when you don’t get treated well by other people. I can tell you from personal experience that I have often made it about me instead of just letting the seemingly personal attack be about what is going on in their world – not mine. It’s a lesson that I am learning over and over again. And every time I learn it, it brings me back to Don Ruiz and his book The 4 Agreements. Don’t Take Anything Personally.

You deserve the best. But you have to go out and create that. The world as you envision it can be made, but yes – you have to first see it. You have to see how you fit into that world – what you do, say, look like, act like – the works. It is when you create this image in your mind that you can truly take it to the next level. Put it on paper and practice every single day. Be that person. Sooner or later, you will become everything you’ve ever wished for.

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project