Posted on December 21, 2012
When I was talking with someone the other day in describing a snapshot of the things that I have been through over the past three years…I created this analogy that I want to share with you. I also want to share it because I think it applies to a lot of people. Everyone really goes through the same things in life they just have different details. However, while we seem different, the cause of wars…hate…and anger towards the unknown…we are all similar beyond belief. Wash the color of skin and scrub the details that make us unique…each of us have a heart…and it is challenged by the same thing as everyone else around the world. Similar, not different. I’m not a glass half full or half empty type of guy, that question isn’t important to me…I look for the glass on the table that is most similar to the one I am drinking out of.
When I started writing, the parking brake was pulled up in my life. When I tried to speed up, I couldn’t go fast…when I would slow down I would almost immediately come to a dead stop. I was in the way of myself. I was my own parking brake. And once you drive around for a while with the brake on…you just avoid going fast all together. You can smell the brake burning, represented by you burning yourself out, and you play small. In fact…you might not even drive the car at all. Stuck. Really stuck.
I had the opportunity to spend 6 days with an amazing group of people, and the glasses were taken off my eyes. Possibilities were open. I could run my life and not be controlled by the emotional garbage men that were always following me. I saw a new way. Life is colorful not black and white. People are inherently good…not bad. Trust. Integrity. Respect. I had the ability to drop that parking brake, and took off. 1st gear. Shift. 2nd gear. Shift. 3rd gear. Shift. 4th gear. Shift. We were moving.
When I walked the stage at Santa Clara, and didn’t feel a thing, I was struck pretty hard by that reality. Why didn’t I even feel a thing? I realized weeks later that graduating wasn’t the dream. In fact, I didn’t even know what the dream was. What are you passionate about? What do you want to do? What will make you happy? What will make you strike like a controlled lightning storm? I realized that writing a book, coaching people, getting real results out there in the world, taking all the knowledge I have gained over the past 4 years at school and applying it right off the bat would make me proud. Yah, I have $0…but I am at the point where that can all change. And that is what it is about…putting your money, reputation, and heart on the line for something you believe in. I am all in.
So what happened during this phase…I realized that I have 4 more gears. I mentally began to see myself as something that was incredibly high performance. Yes sometimes I have to do some serious maintenance on my life, but it is okay to believe you are your dream car…as long as your life represents that type of performance. When there is a disconnect between actions and words, you are going to get into trouble. So I am shifting gears. There are more gears than I thought were possible…especially since I had originally been driving a car that had trouble starting and even going.
Drop the brake, and take off. Keep going. Get on the race track of your life…don’t just be in the stands watching someone else do it. Have a lead foot. See how far your car can take you. You will be pleasantly surprised.
The Better Man Project