When I was in kindergarten, there was this girl I had a crush on. I knew she liked me because she used to chase me around the playground. We used to play kickball and of course, as you can imagine, kindergarten romance involved “koodies” and plenty of teasing when it came to the opposite gender. I remember one day we were sitting down outside of class against the wall waiting for our parents to come and all of the sudden–she kissed me on the cheek. Woah!
Two days later, she pushed me into a rose bush that was the king of all rose bushes. I actually fell completely into this thing and was sitting there in pure pain. After pulling myself out, I had to go home because my cuts and scrapes were so bad. This is not a story about romance–although I found out at a very young age how confusing girls can be sometimes – instead, it is a story about the good that comes along with the bad.
The other day I wrote about leading a life that is absent of arrogance, but I realized I learned the lesson of not gloating for too long at a young age. There are things in life that are going to make you incredibly happy, but if you try to hold onto them too tight, eventually, you will get pushed into some thorns.
If there is something I have truly learned over the past year it has been the value of accountability. When I say this, I’m referring to accountability for the things I said I was going to do, for the way I want to act, and for my dreams. It is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself. The ability to follow through and act upon what you said you would is a blessing. Believe me, there are plenty of examples of false promises in the world—all you have to do is take a look at politicians to get the picture. They make their livelihoods on false promises and then blame it on the other party. Most of the time, they blatantly lie and somehow get away with it. But since we don’t know the facts, we kind of just sit there clapping with no idea of what really is going on. That is probably the most you will ever hear me talk about politics… ever.
In a world full of silver linings and golden parachutes, where we award people for poor performance and give trophies to everyone even if they lose, I stand as a firm believer in competition. More than that, I believe in competing with yourself. I do believe that everyone has a chance to do something great with their lives. I also believe that people can turn things around. Finally, I believe that willpower is the only thing you need to change as an individual. Once you want it enough, you can do it. That is where the magic is—it’s inside of you, and you’re not going to get it from anyone else.
Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project
Evan, thank you for all the inspiration. And thank you for following my blog, My Poetic Spirit. Wishing you a very Happy Holiday. ~Mary
so true!
Good stuff! It is way past time to transition out of the competitive with others mind and focus on besting your self. It’s all in our heads anyway. That is where the greatest opponent lies, in the last place we’d ever look. It’s way past time to pass from the competitive with others to the creative. Far more can be accomplished with honey than vinegar, said Abraham Lincoln. Even with those we perceive as our “enemies”.
Competition within one’s self is a way of always being the best we can be. Thanks for sharing.
great post!
Reblogged this on David Emeron: Reflections upon Reflections and commented:
How very sweet!
Exceptional post and thank you for sharing. I am in a constant state of passionate desire to become a better man. These words and this blog of inspired wisdom assit my quest in so many ways and with every new post. Edw.
“When there is a will there is a way…”
and this is the words that always been the push for me…and now I have people like you that inspires and motivates me with your sharing…thank you Evan…
I truly agree with you “accountability is the biggest gift you can gift to yourself” Nice indeed.
I totally agree with competing with and challenging yourself -it’s really the only competition that matters.
Nice transition from a childhood memory that most of us (me, too) can identify with to a life lesson so important.
Reblogged this on Bryan Hall – Spiritual Electrician Blog and commented:
True determination resides within oneself.
To change your life, you must first change your ideas and thoughts.
Hold on to your dreams … they are yours and yours to be fulfilled.
Thank you to Evan Sanders, for this Great Article!
My last day in high school I had just about everyone sign my yearbook. I took it home, very glad that high school was over–because I had hated it, only to discover all these notes from guys that said I was pretty and they wished they had got to know me better, etc etc. I was mad. I had never had a date from a guy at my high school (only college age boys or guys from another high school) and if the guys had just stepped up to the plate, I would have so totally dated them. Every single one of them. Even the geeks.
The Moral? Boys are stupid – push them into rose bushes.
Great post – and a timely reminder of the importance of being true to yourself. We can be our own worst enemies and our harshest critics. It is only by determination and self-belief that we can become as great as we know we can be.
I posted last week a guide to making valuable New Year’s resolutions – you have reminded me to follow up on that, and to make my own – thank you!
How I miss being chased around the “play ground” by that little girl who so obviously liked me and showed her love in such tender ways.
As I sat on the bus on the way to school each morning I was excited about arriving in my classroom and the look on the other kids faces when she and I had our first push and shove interaction of the day.
As I have learned in my adult life, I am still inspired by these moments as I relish the opportunity to share such bliss again, yet these days I purposely run a little slower so it’s easier for her to catch me.
With every ounce of me I say thank you for the opportunity to thrive, be honest with myself and share hopefully in the trust and accountability of others.
This is a great post. Well done. I only have one question about why you were confused about a girl pushing you into a rose bush? DO you often stereotype the female in a certain pattern of behavior? Would the same act have been something to brush off if it was a male friend? Or maybe you had a crush on her and she just wanted to be friends?
Sir you could be a hopeless romantic the women will chase!!!
I too believe that I am my biggest competition. Only I can stand in my way of doing the stuff that I really want to do and only my own willpower can push me through. Thanks for sharing this wonderful story!
This reminded me of my childhood sweetheart, his name was John we were only 5 but we got married. Then I had to move away, but years and years later I met my soul partner his name is also John..different John but completely reminded me of my first childhood sweetheart. And yes accountability is paramount to an honest life