I always knew it was going to happen, I just didn’t really know when. As the big guy would have it, he would make it happen on my birthday. How did I react? Just how I wanted to…actually, exactly what is in line with what I believe in. There is no doubt in my mind that if I didn’t know what I stood for, that this whole situation would have gone completely different. So, the event occurred, right in front of my eyes, the last thing of my past that I knew had to be cleaned up…and I did it with respect. The details don’t belong here, but the message does. There is always a way of doing things with respect. It may not be viewed by society as “macho” but let’s be honest, that doesn’t even matter.

We are tested in the occasions that truly magnify our character. If you have bad character, it will come out. If you have good character, it will show. What had happened a long time ago to cause the whole situation in the first place was a massive violation of trust and respect against me involved with secrecy…which eventually leaked. My hands were shaking when I heard. But I bounced right back, and recovered. I forgave in my heart, and moved on. But there was always that chance of a final encounter, and that was what happened last night. My heart didn’t even elevate…I was calm…and I was myself. In the end, that is all that you can ask for right?

After it was all over, I felt like a gigantic weight had been lifted off my shoulders. And this feeling drives me to talk to everybody today about something incredibly important. I learned way back when, that if you don’t clean up things in your past, you will drag them into the present. Unfortunately, we all tend to do this, and it is a damn shame because it really screws things up for us. We take a perfectly good day and mess it up because we have failed to do the dirty work. When you sweep things under the carpet, they are still under the carpet. Don’t forget that.

Believe in yourself and who you are. Everything else will fall into place

Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project