Posted on February 26, 2012
I think a lot about courage. In fact, I have thought about courage since I was little. I would always imagine scenarios where I would have to do something courageous and come through. Usually, I would play these parts out with my dog in the yard, saving her from something or protecting her from some monster. She had no idea what I was doing but she sure as hell loved to lick my face after I saved her. I think about her almost every day. For me, looking back on it now, it took courage to let her go. We tried to keep her alive for as long as we possibly could, but I could only see the pain in here eyes because she wasn’t the dog she used to be. I still get tears in my eyes when I think about her. Almost every time I go home I walk out to the back yard where she is buried and say hi. I sit down on the view where she would always lay down and ask her how she’s doing up there in heaven. There is no doubt in my mind that she was an angel sent down to me to guide me through my childhood. Not taking anything away from anyone else, but she truly was my best friend. One day, I will have another dog just like her, and will go to the ends of the world to make it happen. For right now, I know she walks beside me every day, looking up ready for our next journey .
Courage. What takes courage? I think as I have moved on throughout my life so far, courage is actually redefining itself. What I mean by this is that it’s rarely about going and saving someone from death or running into a burning building. People face choices of whether or not to display courage every day. I have had my moments of cowardice, and they turn my stomach when I think about them. I like to keep those moments close to the chest because it reminds me of who I don’t want to be. I have also my moments of great courage. I think, at least for me, having the guts to do something that I know is going to be scary and potentially emotionally and physically draining applies to what I am talking about. It’s about having the courage to do what you know is right in your heart.
There will be moments in your life where you ask “I wonder how much more of it I can take.” I remember having a discussion with my roommate a year ago about what is my purpose of even trying anymore. If one thing, after the next, after the next keeps on happening, why am I even putting myself in that position anymore? He just looked at me and said, “But that’s not what your made of” and that shut me up pretty fast. He is right, that’s not what I am made of. No matter how bad it is, you have to pull through. It’s torture. You will have your moments. We all stray from ourselves at some point or another, but if our moral compass is pointed in the right direction, we will all get there. You won’t be able to do it on your own. There are a handful of people I trust in unbelievably who have helped me from the beginning. Without them, I don’t think I would be as happy as I am right now. That’s what good friends are for, to pick you up when you are down. And I definitely have great friends. For me to put myself in other people’s hands is hard for me. I like to know that I have some control over my life. But as there have been plenty of moments of friends crying in my arms, I have to give them that same chance. So far, they have had it. But there are parts where I am taking this journey on my own.
I have ventured into some pretty deep places that I never visited because I was scared. Amongst the darkness, I also found great light in things I never thought I would. Sometimes confronting the things that you have hidden away is the best thing for you. Bring them out into the light and dust them off, they aren’t as bad as you thought they once were. But make sure to bring a flashlight and check the batteries, you might be looking around in the dark for a while.
Give yourself the chance to be courageous. It’s hard. Going through days when a lot of your downtime is barraged by emotions is one of the hardest things to do. There is no way to avoid it. All you can do is pull out a chair and allow these thoughts to be poured out until they are in the open. However, there are those moments where that is always taken away. Hold onto those dearly. Sometimes I wonder if I am doing the right thing. That takes faith. Being blindly guided by your heart really can be hard. But we all have to take that leap of faith sometimes. Like I wrote a while ago, we must trust in the path. What makes my path difficult is that I can’t really see what’s going to happen, but like any path, that is usually the case. What I can do is walk down that path and just trust that there will be more path around the bend. Paths aren’t like mountains where you know where you have to go and possibly how hard you have to work to get up it. Paths, can go on, and on, and on….and you never know where they might lead you. I don’t know where I am going, and while that’s scary, it’s also exhilarating. If you haven’t tried, you haven’t lived.
No matter what you are going through, have the courage to face it in full. Put your butt on the line today, and face those fears head on.
The Better Man Project
Great words, Evan. Thank you for that. I needed it.
Beautiful post, Evan. And yes, the most profound acts of courage often happen alone and away from others, when you somehow manage to muster the will to get back up after being knocked down again and again; to go on in spite of the hurt; to believe that there really is a path when you can’t see the nose in front of your face, much less a path.
Congratulations again on being Freshly Pressed. I look forward to your posts every day, and I’m glad that you’ve been “discovered” by a larger audience. 🙂
Wow… Thats deep and a great challenge.. thanks.
This is such a great post, and so inspirational! Thank you.
Reblogged this on Jog On Jules and commented:
Re-Blog – A great post so I thought I would share…
Amazing post…and I loved the music. Thanks 😉
Your post leapt of the page at me today. It felt like you have been spying on me, this is what I need right when I needed it. Thank you for your openness and honesty you may never realize how valuable that quality truly is, but I hope that you continue to see the fruit of your courage and openness. Until then…
Great post! It’s so true. I’m facing a scary situation right now. And while it’s not ideal, its something I’ve needed to do for a while. Pushing through those painful emotions is difficult, but I’m feeling stronger evedyday! Thanks for posting!
Continue to walk in courage. Blessings to you.
A truly fantastic post and one that struck a chord with me. I am going to re-blog this tomorrow as I know this can help others. Thank you Evan
Reblogged this on Work the Dream and commented:
I like to share other blogs and let others get to read them that might not have found their page before. This is a truly great written blog post. I hope you enjoy.
First let me say…since I am older than dirt..:) I am so PROUD of you for this post. It is an awesome post and took courage to write. Sometimes our courage is just in standing up for what is the right thing to do or moving away from that which is the wrong thing to do. I want to reblog this for I find it a post worth spreading around.
Great inspiration and encouragement. Thank you. Sometimes we don’t have a clue on the way forward but just know that we must trust and have faith.
So well-written and a lovely read. Thank you
Courage is feeling the fear and doing it anyway!
Thank you for a beautiful post. The word “courage” is one of my favourites. “All of our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them.” – Walt Disney.
It sure did….
Lovely to read today. Thank you!
Great post, thanks. I know someone right now who will be helped so much with this post……