I made 3 commitments to someone incredibly special in my life a few months ago. I would like to share them with you because if I have learned anything over these past few months, it’s that there is no better feeling in the world that living in the present moment with someone who you care about dearly. I wanted to share this because it has always been in the back of my mind day by day and really driven me.

1. I promise to never know you

The minute you think you know someone, all the fun goes away. It’s the same old person again. But, if you promise to never know them, you get to find them each and every day. That is such a gift to give to yourself. Those people next to you, no matter who they are, will be new each and every day. And isn’t that really something? I mean you can also make that commitment and find yourself each day. It also ties into creating yourself each day. I promise you that today I was drastically different from I was yesterday. I don’t want to be predictable. I want to be a true original. To be original, you have to break some of the rules. Not the law, but the rules of life. Give yourself the chance to find yourself each and every day, and I can tell you from personal experience, you will be happier than ever. Also, if you give the other person that promise, they have the ability to be free from the shackles of “you always do this” and “oh I know what you are going to do.” Those two phrases have been deleted from my vocabulary.

2. I promise to never need you

Might sound slightly negative at the start, but the rest of that sentence is “…need you to be anything you aren’t.” Accepting people for exactly who they are and who they aren’t is beautiful. There are tons of people in this world, and none of them are exactly like the next. What makes every special is completely unique to each person. But once you start needing someone to do this or that, you are making them into someone who they aren’t. Why would you want to make the people you love and care about the most in the world someone they aren’t? Intentionally you wouldn’t…but a lot of the time we do that to each other. “I promise to never need you.” This is great with your friends too. It is amazing how if you don’t need people, the relationship completely relaxes. Of course people should enjoy other people’s company, but I think that being your own person exactly the way you are and being accepted by everyone else would be an amazing way to go through life. Acceptance of flaws and beauty is life. I have written about this many times, but there are opposites that exist in the world…believe it or not. But its amazing how many times I hear the “well they are in the honeymoon phase.” The phase of everything is perfect blah blah blah. Well, I encourage you to skip that phase, and enter into something much more profound. Pure awe of the other person. Exactly the way they are. Flaws are beautiful. Flaws make us human. In a society that encourages perfection and magnifies imperfection, the pressure is on. But being imperfect makes you that much more real, vulnerable, and just…amazing. Be your own person. Be imperfect. Loving yourself and respecting yourself will help you respect other people.

3. I promise to rock your world every day.

True passion never dies. Simple. Some fires will continue to burn.

These 3 commitments have helped me so much in my relationship, my friends, and to myself. Its not often I write about this kind of stuff, but I feel that hanging onto this without sharing would be selfish. Today was an amazing day because I enjoyed every single second of living. In fact, over the past few months, I have enjoyed living. No matter what was going on, I have loved every single second. Accepting life for what it is…a gigantic learning experience. Share your life with the people around you. Love to death everyone in your life. And never forget, love you.


Evan Sanders
The Better Man Project