Over time and somewhere along the way…
I lost perspective of something very very important.
The steps I’ve taken.
Ever since I was little, I’ve been incredibly hard on myself. Not in the way of bringing myself down (although that happened at times) but more of a frustration knowing that I could act better than I was.
As time went on and life added up its rounds against me, that frustration grew. The anger of things not going my way compounded and I felt demoralized that this was all that life had to offer.
I’m not sure exactly when it was but at some point I started hearing a voice that was telling me that there was more to understand, unlock and explore than I had perceived.
There were secrets.
There were answers.
All I had to do was go out and search for them.
I was called to break down my fear of being alone.
I was called to change the ways I was living.
And when I did, those answers and doors started to open. The process of understanding that what you see and perceive might be skewed in many different ways came to light.
What’s difficult and what I never understood at the beginning of my journey was that the truths you discover might require you to head in the exact opposite direction of where everyone else is going.
That’s hard to swallow at times.
However, as the years go by I’m finding peace in being able to survive harmoniously in this world — living according to these truths I’ve come to understand — without having to go to war with the way “things should be.”
Fluidity and flexibility.
Not everything is going to be perfect and it rarely ever is. Therefore, I shouldn’t have that expectation of myself either.
I have been doing my best to find the balance between stepping into the lessons I’ve been taught and being able to be flexible with them in the name of friendship, community and enjoying my time here.
This hasn’t been the easiest thing in the world because that mind of mind still seeks out perfection and is in the process of settling down.
I’m still learning.
It’s really easy to forget all of the steps you’ve taken to arrive at the very moment you are in.
For me, its been a journey of almost 8 years and to be honest, I’ve forgotten at times all that I’ve been through and all it has taken to get here.
There have been very difficult times, very good ones and everything in between.
Lately, my intuition tells me that whatever is in front of me are going to be wonderful years. It also tells me that in order to have those be everything they can be, I must continue to grow, learn and make the changes I’m being asked to make.
So in honor of that I’m moving forward with flexibility, strategy, a whole lot of love and excitement for what is to come.
That’s all I can be.
The Better Man Project