Happiness is like a butterfly.
I think about this word a lot actually. What it would mean to do this life in an extraordinary way? What it would be like to love people around you in a way that was so extraordinary they would forever be branded by that love…a love that was unforgettable in the finest sense of things…
I have been and always will be a young man chasing dreams. Even when I am old and gray I hope to still have that fire inside of me that will want to explore the unknown…hopefully taking my boat out into open waters and sailing around the world. The sea is in my blood. The ocean. The changing and shifting of things constantly. The mountains are my heart. I finally am beginning to understand why I was always so torn between living next to the ocean or living in the mountains. Each of them are beyond fundamental to my living.
The heart. The blood.
This week has been such an extraordinary week in the way that I have arrived at so many different interesting places that I can feel defining me already. Truly, I am traveling in uncharted waters and the hardest thing to do at times is to be able to look myself in the mirror and say to myself, “Faith. Faith is all you need.”
My faith runs as deep as the depths of that same ocean and it creates the currents that I travel by. But there has still been that struggle at times to also say to myself, “I am the one.”
I am the one who has been chosen to go on this voyage…I am the one who can accomplish what these visions have created in my mind…I am the one who is the perfect fit for this journey.
Because in truth, if I don’t chase after this dream in the time I have left in this life…there will be things that would die with me that would never be seen again. I can’t let these visions die with me…they have overwhelmed me with emotion and goosebumps at times and I have shared them with only a few…and as challenging as they are at times they excite me beyond belief. What if I really did do that? What if I could watch this happen? Can I really do it.
Evan…you’re the one.
It has taken me some time to get to this place…where I am at this evening, but I can feel it starting to sink in. There are all of these situations going on in my life that are asking me to finally just say it…
You’re the one kid. You are exactly what we need here. You’ve taken it this far with that shred of doubt still living inside of you but we need you to say it to see these things through. We need you. All of you. Everything you’ve got.
And here I am…ready to give it.
Like I’ve said in previous posts, I want to show you what I’m creating instead of telling you, but I can tell you this. What will happen when I go back into what I’m working on full-bore and without hesitation will change my life.
It will allow me to live in such a way that will forever not just change my reality, but the realities of those who are close to me. It will change how I live, how I travel, how I spend my time, who I spend my time with, but most importantly…it will allow me to enter into the arena and establish a type of “reach” that I’ve never had before.
My mission in this life is to touch the corners of this earth with encouragement…because honestly, the world needs it. The world desperately needs someone to fearlessly love the people and things that are in it. It needs encouragement. It needs healing. It needs some passion, some uncaged enthusiasm, some more love.
And here I am, sitting typing away at my computer on September 13th 2015 finally saying…I’m the one to give it.
These callings, these deep callings to give something I’ve been given as much as I possibly can away in pure faith are as much a part of me as anything else right now. They have come to define me down to my core and have built themselves into my structure. I can’t get rid of them. I can’t ignore them. I can’t look past them.
Trust me, I’ve tried. I’ve tried to keep them at bay because they were so grandiose that I couldn’t possibly believe that this was what I was supposed to take on. In the past people have tried to quiet down my enthusiasm and excitement for my dreams for one reason or another and I started to believe what they were saying. But as they faded away and I brought positivity into my life, I started to see once again that the dreams never died…they’ve just been waiting for me to really give it everything.
I can’t tell you exactly what is around the corner because it’s all fog to me. I’ve never been in a better position in my life because of all of the work that I have done throughout the past 5 years of really discovering what the hell I was made of…and you would think that this would allow me to look farther into the future and understand things…but I can’t.
It has actually snapped my focus back to what is going on right now and since I’m sailing in places I’ve never gone before I actually have no idea what the hell to do at times – but I still feel led. I feel led by some sort of deep gut intuition that is telling me to head this way, say this, do this, continue being this and it will all work out…I’m feeling these things deeply and who knows if that is inner wisdom or something else.
But what I do know is that there’s this long term vision, and then there’s me right now. There’s this young man chasing his dreams like I was a crazy man chasing happiness.
And I love it.
I love it all.
But I’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time.
And I’ll say it again.
I’m the one.
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