The Planting Of Diamonds

Image (23) Screen-Shot-2014-10-15-at-7.58.41-AM.png for post 11241

Every once in a while I take a step back from writing to really get a feel for it again. It’s not that I don’t like coming here, but I think I instinctually know after almost 5 years of writing when to take a little bit of a mental break. This past week has been one of the most rewarding weeks of my life as I launched my own life coaching business, was honored with many requests to work with me, and took another leap I never thought I would have taken if you only asked me this a year ago. I never thought way back when I was planting the diamonds of my future. Now, I guess I really understand the importance of creating a vision for yourself.

Last year for me, while there were some very bright spots, was “the pit” of my life. Whenever I tell my story, I have two major pits that I have fallen into, traversed, and climbed out of. Sure there are many downs…but truly none as deep as the one before The Better Man Project started and then during my time in Los Angeles. I lost a piece of myself down there. Looking back on it now, I can only see how extreme some of the things I was going through were. That may be a surprise to those who knew me down there, but in the time I have come back up here I truly realize that I was in a bad place and needed to get out.

I did.

I always have assigned new chapters to my life when I can really feel them coming on (is that much of a surprise for a writer?). This chapter however is really about going for it. I might have said this in a blog before, but it’s about truly branching out into the uncomfortable places of my life, the edges, and getting really comfortable there. A month-ish back I left an old life behind and left the harbor of what I knew was safe and familiar. That decision landed me here, coming across a calling to start a practice, and has also called me to start putting out a significant amount of content to reach as many people as possible. I’ve been listening to these calls loud and clear and haven’t really wasted a moment taking action with them. In fact, I’ve been hearing these calls so much that some of my practices that I do every single day have fallen to the back burner a bit…something I need to get back into as soon as possible.


I’ve noticed lately that I’ve been growing in a way where I am finally realizing that I can’t do everything at once. I do have capacity issues. In the past I would really challenge myself to get as much done, do as much, provide as much, etc without really accepting the consequences…and it wouldn’t really burn me out fully, but it would be a brown out if I were to be honest about it. That way of doing things is not really sustainable at all. You have to be willing and able to create a consistent game plan for yourself that ends with the accomplishment of a long term vision. Not a vision to grasp at or drool over, but one that truly resonates with your heart and you know is a worthwhile cause to pursue.

This is something that I am working on in my life right now.

The first part of my vision lands me at 30 years old and then the second part strikes when I am 35. But I have to plant those seeds now in order to see them grow into that future. Sure things are subject to change along the way, but I know that what is in my mind and in my heart with all of this is worth my effort and my time.

I think the interesting part about life is that we always go on this little mini-journeys throughout the years and if we are courageous enough to answer the call, we learn more about ourselves than we could have ever possibly imagined. I know that this is where I am at right now and can’t imagine going back to the way I was before. I actually can’t go back. Once your mind has been expanded, it can never shrink back down to a previous state of consciousness. It will always be changed.

I will always be changed.

– Evan Sanders


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  • entropyaffronted
    July 17, 2015 at 7:07 pm

    fear is the acceptance of being weak, reality is the calculation of perception. those that live with fear are already broken, those that live in reality, weather perceived or acute live correctly no matter how incorrect there actions may be.

    • thebettermanprojects
      July 17, 2015 at 7:11 pm

      It’s an interesting comment, but fear will always be a factor in anyones life. We can’t remove fear or try to avoid it….experiential avoidance is a prison cell. It’s what we do with our fear (either let it control us or make decisions despite it) that is the real magic. We all are afraid from time to time – it doesn’t have to be weakness really. Also, understanding that you are afraid is reality. Fear is part of our lives just as courage, happiness, sadness is etc. It’s a powerful powerful emotion…one that we can use or let destroy us.

      • entropyaffronted
        July 17, 2015 at 7:51 pm

        fear is not just a word or an emotion and its definition is not a one dimensional feel good greeting card, an online meme’s blunt three or four words over a bicycle pic without the training wheels “fear” is an unpredictable emotion in response to a generally unpredictable action, and as a grown man fear does not come often and therefor fear comes with negative corresponding impact. in order for “fear” to “destroy” us we would then be talking about significant periods amidst this state with significant negatives either progressively building, or progressively hitting. striking fear into a grown man 99.9% of the time is a randomized act or action that is generally overwith relatively quickly. and that quick strike takes its toll on us along side the end result of that fear. you wanna talk about fear destroying you? then your talking a whole other scenario with a whole other mindset and a whole other sequence of instilling that fear.

        • thebettermanprojects
          July 17, 2015 at 7:55 pm

          great comment! you are absolutely correct it is not a one dimensional thing at all, nor is it a feel good greeting card or meme haha, very very true.

          • entropyaffronted
            July 17, 2015 at 7:56 pm

            now pay me 75bucks for that, i just life coached you to the finish line.

          • thebettermanprojects
            July 17, 2015 at 7:57 pm

            hahah, not exactly.