The Price You Pay | Ambition

Never before, in my entire life, have I had such an intense purpose and belief in what I am doing.

I can say as another first, that my passion for what I am doing has officially outweighed my passion for baseball…and that is saying a lot. This trifecta of things I am going after in my life right now has given me newfound courage, direction, and despite how physically, spiritually, and emotionally draining it can be at times, every morning, at 4:40am I wake up with an excitement to continue down this path. 

They say you get addicted to success. Right now I can’t tell you how true that is. There’s this weird feeling when you see the progressions from 1.0 version of self to 2.0…and now to 3.0 – all backed up by blood, sweat, and tears. Confidence comes along with that. The ability to challenge yourself more and more comes along for the ride as well. 

I posted this quote to my Facebook page last night because I’ve never seen it before…and I am absolutely in love with it for many reasons. 

“The longer you look back, the farther you can look forward.” – Winston Churchill

There have been many times throughout this journey that I have found profound quotes that completely fit into the ideology behind this project…I just didn’t know it yet. The quote by Churchill reminds me of why I look back at the things that have happened in my life so much. To give myself the chance to stay out of the past however, I look back at specific events as thoroughly as I can, learn from them as much as possible, write about them with truth and heart and then decide to move on. If you spend too much time obsessing over specific events that have happened in the past, you will never be able to escape from living there. You shouldn’t live there. Not because you can’t, but because it stops you from living here…in the most important time there is…the now. 

 Understanding my past for what it actually is, what actually happened, and what the consequences were have allowed me to actually not repeat my history. As hard as those decisions have been sometimes, I know that I am making the right ones. I know I am making the right decisions because I have learned from my past ones…which usually were bad ones. 

ambition

There’s something else to this that needs to be mentioned. Trust in yourself. Trust in your  gut feeling and what that voice on the inside is trying to tell you. I didn’t trust that for a long time for every reason there is (a line probably longer than the distance to the sun back then). But now, I understand that the feelings that come up inside of me can be trusted. They aren’t explosive. They are rooted in love. They are rooted in passion. The only time I really have to try to check myself is when those character traits are starting to be attacked – then I get defensive. The jury is still up on whether or not that is ok – something to explore in the future. 

Ambition is a funny thing. I found this the other day and wanted to write about it. 

The Cost Of Ambition

  • Late nights, early mornings
  • Lots of associates, very few friends
  • You will be misunderstood. Constantly
  • You will be single unless you’re lucky enough to find someone who understands your lifestyle
  • People will want you to do good but never better than them. And for that reason you will do a lot of things alone

That’s all very interesting to me. It’s interesting because I have experienced all of those at one time or another. In fact, these past couple years, if that was a checklist that ensured ambition was indeed present, would be filled with check marks all over the place. You lose people because they don’t understand the way you live, people talk poorly about you behind your back, and people overtly or secretly want you to fail and they often make that known through their words or interactions…or lack of actions. There will be very very few close friends and plenty of grinding. Those early mornings test you every single day and the sacrifices you have to make for weeks on end make you sometimes doubt if you are missing out on anything. The price of ambition is high, the sacrifices are high, but if you are willing to take it on…it will pay you back 100 times over. 

I used to doubt what I was doing…maybe that’s why I failed so many times. 

But now, the doubts have wilted away. They have left as the weeks have gone by because every single day there is a constant proving with actions that are far louder than words. Intent means very little in the face of actions.

Actions are the house, foundation, and building materials…intent is the wallpaper. 

Build your future one action at a time. Know why you are doing what you are doing…because then you will have results for every action. These are things you can measure, look at, analyze…and when the time is right move forward in making better decisions or continue down the path you are on. Stick it out. Make sure you spend a chunk of time committing to something and see what it’s like before moving in another direction. Deciding that something is not for you is not giving up, it’s being smart about your life, what you want from it, and if it fits in your path. Be loving. Be giving. Be understanding. Stand up for yourself when you need to. And grind. Grind your butt off. 

– Evan Sanders 

P.S. Make sure you comment below. I would love to hear your thoughts.

 

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