I Hear Them Laughing

I hear them laughing. I hear them talking about me like it wouldn’t come back to me somehow. I hear them saying “He can’t.”

I can…I will

Every time I hear them laughing, I use that. I use that feeling inside to drive them further. I’ve heard things…things that they probably thought were said in confidence to another. Unfortunately, those things traveled and they landed in my ears. I’ve heard the opinions of people who used to love me telling others that they hate me.

Those words stung like a deep cut and out bled my past.

But I use it.

I take all of it and wrap it up tightly and force it down within, knowing exactly where I placed it, so when I need it I can light it on fire to propel myself to the next level. Whatever is left I use and use again. These things are necessarily matches, but more like reusable batteries. You can slam them into the walls of your soul and they can fuel you for days, weeks, months on end when you need them.

And that is what life has taught me – it’s never been about the perfectly sunny days, but about how to be your best in the deepest and darkest of them all. How to transform, when needed, into the black night hawk that soars through the sky continuing his search for his prey.

A man with goals flies in the same way.

I am not the type of man who builds his worth on the acceptance of others, nor will he fall because of their criticisms. I am a man who will rise and fall by his own hands and work sending my end product every day up to the heavens for judgement. When you know who you are creating for, you must also remind yourself that judgement can only be brought upon by them. Not by the opinion of man. Man judges by the failures in their hearts rather than seeing the purity of something that someone has created.


I spent 14 weeks of my life changing, morphing, adapting and adjusting to a dream that I never thought was possible, and I will spend another 14 changing again. I looked at myself and my life and knew I had more in the tank. I knew that I could undertake another journey that could transform my life even more. But what’s the difference now? The difference is that I know what is possible for myself now. I know that I can take it all the way and find the answers I need when I need them.

I can do this.

I can still hear them laughing.


I need that.

Because I’ll have the last laugh.

– Evan Sanders


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  • Rajiv
    October 17, 2014 at 12:15 am

    You echo the voice of my own heart