The Momentum Builders

When I was young I used to spend the summer days and nights in my treehouse playing and getting lost in books.

I never liked to read much when I was young, but when I had a book in my hand that was about a young boy off adventuring in the world I would get lost in the pages. But it’s not so much the books I remember, but a special moment in which I would daydream as if I was in the story and be so in peace that I would fall asleep and wake up hours later.

Whatever was going on inside quickly became a placid lake and I would wake up refreshed and ready to dive back into the pages and start it all over again.


There weren’t many children around the play with, so it was always my dog and I in the yard and I would make up heroic situations in which I would save her. I guess you could say that I have had a little bit of knight-in-shining-armour syndrome since I was young.

But I was taught something special throughout all these years of playing in the yard with my companion. Some might say it is the ability to entertain myself. Yes, to some extent I agree. However, I think it goes a little bit deeper than that. I think what I learned is exactly what is written in the quote above from Hooks: loving others unconditionally – for exactly what they are and exactly what they aren’t.

Now of course implementation of this message took a long while…in fact I have to say I am still learning this lesson every day and will probably have this taught to me throughout my entire life. But, without a doubt I have become more accepting of many different types of people and kept myself open to opportunities that I would have closed myself off to before. The stories of the deaf and mute man and the man with the prosthetic leg come to mind.

I know for a fact that it is in the silent moments where our internal voice becomes the loudest. We start to hear what is actually going on for a change when everything around us is drowned out. But when there is something in our stomach…guilt, anxiety, fear, doubt etc. those quiet moments can get really uncomfortable incredibly fast.

Learning how to appreciate the dead silence when no one is around is a blessing. Very special things can happen when you tune in to that voice which whispers to you your dreams and goals.

– Evan Sanders

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  • carrickjason
    July 23, 2013 at 8:56 pm

    Really enjoyed this, especially that last paragraph. We nee to embrace solitude.

  • motivationaltalks
    July 23, 2013 at 8:57 pm

    This is lovely reading it

  • Lisa
    July 23, 2013 at 9:09 pm

    Beautiful, loved the post. 🙂 Indeed, learning to be able to just “be” in those quiet moments can be a challenge, but after having done so life is so much more interesting and full. I spent almost 10 years in a tent in some woods, very quiet woods most of the time, and though the circumstances were not good – there was still a profound change in my life simply because I finally learned how to be quiet and listen.

    For me, being able to hear what my deepest dreams and goals are, the real ones, not those I’m programed to want by our media, those dreams are the ones I go after. It’s so much more fulfilling to chase those dreams, because when you do catch them, and I do catch them, you just feel like some part of you that has been missing is now full.

    It’s wonderful and a blessing that I was able to learn that. Thank you for writing such a great post and sharing the wisdom of finding the quiet within. 🙂

    • thebettermanprojects
      September 3, 2013 at 1:31 pm

      Wow! That is incredible! I am so glad you learned that lesson of being quite and listening! I also really enjoyed what you said about the programmed wants from the media. So true. Learn to listen to yourself 🙂

      Love for you to connect with me on Facebook

  • Day (482) – The Momentum Builders | soulfoodwords
    July 24, 2013 at 3:10 am

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  • soulfoodwords
    July 24, 2013 at 3:12 am

    Thank you Evan. I pressed this on my blog. A beautiful reminder to love yourself first in order to love others. I often struggle with loneliness, but remind myself that is just an illusion. 🙂 Happy alone time to you!

    • thebettermanprojects
      September 3, 2013 at 1:28 pm

      Thank you for the reblog! I appreciate your comment a ton. Loneliness is just the opposite side of the feeling of companionship. Not an illusion…it is totally real. But you can let it pass through you and appreciate life 🙂

      Love for you to connect with me on Facebook

      • soulfoodwords
        September 6, 2013 at 4:38 pm

        I do follow you on facebook 🙂 and also on Twitter.

  • Sabrina.Nelson
    July 24, 2013 at 8:52 am

    Wonderful post! I feel as if my life is speeding past me sometimes and I needed a reminder that it is okay to disconnect and just sit in silence with yourself to regain focus.

  • victoriaanne95
    July 24, 2013 at 5:57 pm

    I love the way you write. I mentioned a very similar topic in a recent post of mine about purifying relationships. The saying goes that you have to love yourself before you can love someone else. Harsh words when you let the reality of what that means sink in…but still true. Great Post.

    • thebettermanprojects
      September 3, 2013 at 1:20 pm

      Yah? What do you like about it so much? And i agree fully with you about loving yourself before you can love others. I think you must also learn how to spend quiet time with yourself so you can hear yourself “speak.” That is where the gold is!

      Love for you to connect with me on Facebook

  • lilaosborne
    July 24, 2013 at 6:45 pm

    Lovely Evan, I’ve had a lot of alone time the past couple years. It really helped me to grow, dead silence was the best medicine. Thanx for sharing this story.

    • thebettermanprojects
      September 3, 2013 at 1:17 pm

      Sometimes the best discussions you can have with yourself are the ones where nothing is said.

      Love for you to connect with me on Facebook

  • klove
    July 25, 2013 at 5:12 am

    I really enjoy your posts. The way you write is very engrossing!

    It makes me not want to blog anymore! Lol

    I spend a lot of time alone and I am ok with t, because I am ok with me. I do worry though that when someone comes along I may find it difficult to transition.

    • thebettermanprojects
      September 3, 2013 at 1:17 pm

      Makes you not want to write anymore?! Why? haha. But you are so right. If you are okay with yourself then the quit is perfect. When you do find someone, you will find that person who can sit in silence with you.

      Love for you to connect with me on Facebook

      • klove
        September 3, 2013 at 2:27 pm

        Because your writing is soooooooo good!

        That sounds like bliss “silent togetherness”

        Oddly in this day and age I am not on Facebook, or twitter, Instagram or any other social network site!

        Lovely speaking to you again! A pleasure as always.

        Big Love