Day (405) – Flag Nor Fail
“I was conscious of a profound sense of relief. At last I had authority to give directions over the whole scene. I felt as if I were walking with destiny, and that all my past life had been but a preparation for this hour and for this trial. Ten years in the political wilderness had freed me from ordinary party antagonisms. My warnings over the past six years had been so numerous, so detailed and were now so terribly vindicated, that no one could gainsay me. I could not be reproached either for making the war or with want of preparation for it. I thought I knew a good deal about it all and I was sure I would not fail. Therefore, although impatient for the morning, I slept soundly and had no need for cheering dreams. Facts are better than dreams.”
~ Winston Churchill
I took my first big breath yesterday. It is pretty easy to forget that you haven’t inhaled right after you launched your dream. It is pretty easy to get caught up in a bunch of different things that truly don’t matter in the scheme of things. But after I got off the phone with a friend who did a fantastic job in calming me down and seeing the light, I slumped back in my chair…took a deep breath…and relaxed. Air. Finally.
It still hasn’t hit me. The magnitude of what I just did. I think these past few days I was almost trying to force that feeling, but realized that it is something that will just show up at the perfect time, it needs not to be forced. You must try to fall in love with the questions themselves. How much of an impact will this really make? How can you spread the message that love, passion, never quit can overcome even the darkest of horrors? What is your heart telling you to do in these moments? But I am making an effort to be comfortable with some pretty uncomfortable questions right now. Those questions drove me a bit mad over the past few days, but now, I am just sitting with them and learning to appreciate them.
You just have to look yourself in the eyes and ask yourself, “Who do I want to be today?” Sounds pretty simple, but it really is an important question. Then you have to ask yourself, “How am I going to do it?” Everyone will give you their advice on how you should do things…but in order to be a true original, you have to break some of the rules. Always stick to your moral compass, but break the rules.
So here I am. Taking those first deep breaths and relaxing. Enjoying the moment. Enjoying being here and not trying to get over there for the time being. It’s a good feeling.
- Evan Sanders
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