When I first started out writing, I was dealing with a whole lot of things at once. Two weeks after the blog began, ::BAM:: a major life event occurred. That can be read about in a different place, but what came out of the event in terms of the combination of my voice and how I put it down on paper was something that became incredibly unique to me without my actually knowing it until recently. In all honesty, what I was attempting to do at the start was respect another persons privacy but still tell me story. Tell exactly what was coming up for me in that day-to-day grind, and get it out onto paper as best as I could. What was created was a unique style of telling a story…without actually telling it.
The details about the events in my life aren’t actually that important to me. What I found is that it is in those moments right after something happens that I truly figure out exactly who I am. Our reactions to things, say more about us than they do about the moment itself. Change the location, change the person (most of the time) and we will still get the same reaction because of how things underwent. But in those days of struggle, I found many things about myself that I will never forget…and I started to write them down.
I tried to ask the big questions first. Who am I? What is my purpose here? Why do I do the things I do? Is there a better way? These questions served to fill pages of paper for the next year. Posts like Our Finest Moments and An Honest Post really were my attempts to dig deep down and try to see what was in me. Much later on, I would start asking more specific questions…once I had healed and recovered. What are my goals? How can I achieve them? And after this phase of trial and error, which never ends by the way, I have been brought to my writing now. To the fine detailing. Interesting this though…is that I never have thought for a second that the big questions shouldn’t be asked. In fact, I believe that the man in the room who admit he truly knows nothing is the most brilliant one. Because once we think we know something, we are lost.
When I sit down to write, whatever is beating inside is going out onto the paper for you to read. If at the end of the day, you can read what I am saying and you catch yourself thinking about something in your own life, then I have achieved my purpose. I wrote in the past that my writing was for me, which it still is on many levels, but there is an undeniable fact that I am writing to other people out there in the crowd of people I haven’t seen or heard yet. I know that one day I will see all of you.
Believe. Believe in yourself and your capabilities. Without that belief in yourself, you will not be able to tackle the hardest questions in your life. There are times where you are going to feel really shitty, and there will be times where you will be bouncing off the walls. But what you cannot do is let that belief go. Believe that things will be okay one day, especially when going through tough times. When you are surrounded by crap, it is hard to imagine a life without it. But once you start getting through it, and towards the exit, you will start running from that crap as fast as possible and never turn back. You will manufacture a happy, powerful life. We call carry baggage. The important thing for me was recognizing what I was carrying.
On a final note, I am going to start hosting Sunday afternoon Skype conference calls for anyone who wants to call in and join. I will put up specific directions this evening on how to be part of that call, but I know that if you are going to be part of it, or plan on being part of it in the future, I am going to need your Skype address so I can add you. I think this will be a really fun way to connect with people, talk and answer questions. Please please head over to the Facebook page (link is below) and join the group. I would love to hear from you.
Please Join the Dream https://www.facebook.com/BetterManProject