Feed Your Faith


Everything that you read last night was a testament to what happens when you live in the past and you worry about the future. Absolutely everything. So what did I do today to snap myself back into the present. I max squatted. In fact, I squatted for my goal of breaking 400lbs by December. I want to walk you through exactly what happened today because I even learned something from this interaction.

I always do legs with one of my best friends Russell because he is on the crew team and wanted to work on gaining strength in his lower half. But the real reason is because he has this awesome attitude. He just does what needs to be done. There is not one word of complaining, actually there are hardly words at all during this workout. We both just put everything we have into the task at hand. We warmup with 45’s…throw on 25’s…throw on 25’s…throw on 25’s and continue to go until we reach the point where we are very low on reps and incredibly heavy (at least for us). This is where things are important. About three weeks ago, Russ was maxing out at 225 on his back. He was struggling every single rep. He needed the spot. Now, he throws 335 on his back and blasts through it. So every time we approach the bar…it is complete focus. We are all in. There isn’t another feeling of the bar bending on your back when you have plenty of weight on it. But the true moment of being “present” is when you are at the bottom of your squat. When you have to come out of it…you are putting everything you have into the floor. You struggle. All the blood in your body rushes to the surface. Legs are tired. But it is the mind that tells the body “Up!!” It is in this moment, you are truly present. Because if you are not…that weight doesn’t make it up. And you end up on the floor.

I made it my goal a year ago when I had surgery that I would Leg Press over 1,000lb and I would squat 400lbs. Today, was my last workout in the Santa Clara students gym because I graduated and they finally have kicked me out. So especially after a day like yesterday, today was incredibly important in terms of launching myself forward. In my head, there was no better time to go after this goal than today. Go out with a bang right? Go out with all engines burning. We got up to 385lbs…for a one rep max…and I decided that it was time to go after it…threw on the final 45lb plate on each side…and just sat there looking at the weight. I could see the bar bending. But I knew in my head that this is exactly what I wanted. I wanted this struggle. For me…this was a milestone…because I remembered laying in bed last August watching my legs shrink over the months (3 inches) and my strength disappearing. I knew that one day, I would make it to my goal and past it. I stood up.


Pure focus…put the bar on my back…Russell standing behind me to spot me…”This is it” I told myself. Down…up. Russell started to walk me forward. “No! One More!” Down…….Up! I didn’t just break the goal… I shattered it by doing another rep. Racked the bar…DONE! The feeling inside was of pure accomplishment. Ecstatic. A perfect example of the fact that if you set your goals…you can achieve anything. You have to accept the blood, sweat, and tears…but you will get there. Feed your faith and your fears with starve.

I found this great quote about everything that comes after you decide to go after something in life.

Then comes a period of waiting and working for the realization of the object of that purpose. During this period, there must be continuous, intensified faith, which serves as the sunshine and the rain, without which the seed will wither and die in the ground. Then comes realization…harvest time.

We reap what we sow. Have faith in yourself, and that you can achieve something great. Today, I went for it…and was given a gift. If you are reading into this story…you will understand. It’s not about the weight at all…it’s about being given back that confidence. The reward for hard work. And the reward for feeding your faith.


Please connect with me! https://www.facebook.com/BetterManProject


Evan Sanders


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  • thelittleacorn
    September 15, 2012 at 4:59 pm

    Feed your faith and your fears will starve — I LOVE THIS!

  • thewardanceofthemindandsoul
    September 16, 2012 at 12:55 am

    Evan, you demonstrate the highs and lows of mental and emotional turbulence so well, through your blog posts. And the resilience needed to overcome our doubts and resistance! Congratulations on meeting your goals. It’s taken such a lot of courage and hard work to get this far. Well done you!

    I was wondering what happens now, now that you’ve got so many changes emerging?

  • balancedwesomeness
    September 16, 2012 at 1:38 am

    I too love this saying…feed your faith starve your fear…epic! And congrats on smashing your goal!

  • qs1998
    September 16, 2012 at 11:02 am

    Reblogged this on whatsup23.