It is our own hands that shape everything in our lives. Our hands tell us where we have been, and they can tell us where we are going. Our hands can touch, can open to others, can hold those who we love and care about. Our hands truly are the portal to our past and the manufacturers of our futures.
I write about integrity a lot, and I truly believe that having integrity is one of the most important things in this life. Because without integrity, we have no ability to keep to our word or to our plans. What is equally as important is the admittance of being out of integrity. When your moral compass twists and turns, it is up to you to admit to the fact…and believe me it takes courage to do this. To be able to not only look at yourself and say that you have been out of integrity, but to look at another person or thing and admit to your faults. Once you do though, you are free from what was hindering you in the first place. Integrity and the act of admitting being out of integrity are at the core of my person, and it is a continuous journey towards acting with outstanding morals and values.
This by far is going to be one of my longest posts…because I have come to a point where I have about 4 or 5 things all converging in my life at the same time. I am going to list them off, get them out there, and really just try to portray all of the emotions and thoughts that are going through my head.
The first is definitely the fact that I am graduating from college in 5 weeks. What an unbelievable ride it has been. There have been serious moments of light, and serious moments of darkness. All in all though, I have grown so much over the past four years. It is amazing to think about the things that have happened, the people who have come and gone, and the events that seemed so big at the time but now in retrospect seem so small. I am proud for overcoming some of the greatest adversities I have ever faced in my life so far. I have gone through heartbreak, but in each of those I have found unbelievable amounts of healing. I have said goodbye to one of my biggest dreams (baseball) and said hello to many other activities that I can love with the same amount of passion: bodybuilding, snowboarding, climbing, surfing…the list goes on. My mom actually asked me the other day what are the two main things I learned in college. I said that the ability to lead people and the ability to separate out what is important and unimportant were the two most important things I had learned so far. I also believe that my ability to study subjects with passion is incredibly important. All 3 of these things are tied for first. I have also created unbelievable relationships with some of my friends and many of my teachers. All of these things are really important to me because I know I will carry them throughout my entire lifetime.
The second thing that is on my mind is getting a job. I have applied to a handful of places all throughout the United States and am just waiting to hear back from recruiters. The good news is that I have heard back from a few saying they really like my stuff and they have sent it to the rest of their team to give it further analysis. I guess what is truly on my mind is just the ambiguity of the waiting game. I know I have all my irons in the fire, and now I just have to be patient. I have been working hard over the past 4 years…and know that this is the moment where the reward happens. I always keep that on my mind…the journey is the preparation…the test is the reward.
The third thing is the fact that I am taking probably the greatest step of my life so far. I will be completely on my own and making my own way for myself. I have been asked many times whether or not I am nervous about this…and to be honest, I feel excited about it. No matter where I end up, I know that I will be in good shape. I know that I am ready to go out into the jungle.
The fourth thing is my development over the past year or so. I am incredibly happy with how far I have come over the past few years, but am looking to further that development. I am looking to push myself to another level…and to be honest I am going to have to do a little bit of soul-searching of how to do that. I really think I need to start reading more books. I need to start looking deep within and have a mentor to make me look deeper than my initial search. Sensei…please teach me.
The last thing on my mind is this blog. I am going to start pushing the limits of my writing and telling a lot of stories. The underlying current of passion and motivation will still be the same, but I need to switch it up a little bit and really throw down some new material. So do not be surprised if you see something completely different from now on…Im growing.
So I think all in all, I am very comfortable about taking a few extra strides in term of my own personal development. The thing is, I don’t exactly have a plan right now for how that development is going to occur, but that is one of the great things about this process. Take a leap of faith and build your wings on the way down.