I’ve had writers block pretty bad lately. I don’t know if its the fact that I don’t know what to write, but rather how to say it. I’ve been leaving the things that I really want to say out. I don’t know why. I guess in some ways writers block is actually a good thing.
In our lives, there are plenty of times we get stuck. Stuck in a rut, or really just stuck in one space. We can’t figure out how to get ouf of it, how to take the next step. Most of this is due to fear. Fear to challenge yourself, your current comfortable position. I have been having the most interesting dreams lately. I see myself in situations and I see myself acting in different ways, and then I see the outcome of each way. The crazy part about these situations is that these are things that can happen every day, and most likely will happen in the future. No I am not seeing the future, but I am seeing things that have a good chance of happening. So that is pretty interesting. But what happens when we get stuck in a rut? What the hell do you do?
I read. I have a library of books in my room. I didn’t use to read that much because it was hard for me to. But I think once I got past the fact that it was going to be hard, I really started to enjoy reading. Maybe it was the fact that it wasn’t assigned and I could just read for fun. Who knows? All I know is that I have learned so much in the past few months with my eyes glued to the pages. I have never really read the Bible that much. I think it was because my own personal relationship with God sucked. However, believe it or not, I have been through hundreds of pages of it. I don’t take it literally, I take it for the messages that are within it. Everyone has their own beliefs on faith, and whatever they are that is completely fine. But my view is something deeply personal. I will never voice it because then its not personally, you know? Going to church is just a small part of my weekly encounters with God. Where you can find my faith is in the words that I pray before I go to sleep. They are rarely for me…they are for other people who need Him again.
I write. Could you tell? I actually write a lot more than what ends up in here. I write pages and pages and pages, pretty much about anything that comes up in my mind. Writing is great because I have chance to put things down on paper that I have been thinking about. It also really gives you the chance to do this great process, which is….think about what your going to write, you think about it while your writing about it, and then you think about what you just wrote. I mean good lord you really get to cover a lot of ground there. There are some times in the blog where I really try to sit down and fashion words that match feelings. Most of the time however, I just write what is coming straight out of my heart. So far, I think that has been a really good way of doing things.
Today I went down to Carmel to be part of the World’s longest yoga chain. I went with one of my best friends Greg and we just talked all the way down. He’se been struggling with some things lately, and me likewise, and we came to this. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. At the end of the day, do what makes you feel good. If that means putting yourself out there into some murky waters, you just have to tread out there. You will never know whats on the other side of those waters too if you dont venture out there. The night is darkest before the dawn. The second thing we came down to, is sometimes you just have to go do what you think you cannot do. If that means going somewhere, or doing something that frightens you, then you just have to do it. You will never know the outcome of a situation is if you keep yourself out of it. So here’s something that I can implement into my life. Do one thing a day that scares me. Thats what this whole week will be about. Doing something that scares me. I have a list of things I am afraid of to do, but its time to make that list a lot shorter.
Challenge yourself to do one thing a day that scares you. Whether it is reaching out to someone who you haven’t talked to in a long time, challenging your body, your work, your friends…face your fears.